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oh fuck you too.
im tired of always being second.

easily manipulated and easily hurt

exactly, and i just dont know what to do

dont let them step all over you stop overthinking and just make a move

easier said than done, the only way i can do something is if i really have to

then doesnt that show how much you dont really deserve it.

quite possibly but what could that matter. itslike this thing i read, girls are like apples or something and the best ones are at the top, but the boys are to scared to climb to the top of the tree so they get the ones at the bottom who are easy while the ones at the top wait and think there is something wrong with them. and they have to wait for the boy who was brave enough to climb to the top.

i dont follow.

i climbed to the top on more than one occasion. and each time i fell. even though it didnt feel like it each fall dug deeper and deeper. so i made my own one. the boys climb to the top of the tree where they think all the great apples(girls) should be, and all they get is pain. they fall out or there are worms in there apples or they are rotten from the sun on them all the time. and the guys that fell down wonder why the apples at the top arent good and think there is something wrong with them.

so you think something is wrong with you?

idk maybe im just depressed. ive been depressed lately. its quite annoying.

so why dont you do something about it.

so many times ive tried and nothing ever works out. its like the world is out to get me and i cant do anything. ill just sit around and watch my life pass by. ive done enough with my life.

so what youre just going to give up. just like that. what about all the dreams you had and the places you wanted to see.

thats why they invented tv. for failures like me. to subside their anguish on this hell hole we call earth. while the stylish good looking people make us hate every part of what we are. so we dedicate ourselves to getting money and being like them. and when you get there, what....

idk.

well when you get there you realized you want to be like someone else. there is no way you are ever happy. there is no dream job. you cant do anything for the rest of your life and be happy about it. at some point you will realize how pointless it is.
i used to watch anime nad i would watch and then on a certain episode somewhere halfway through the series youd realize there is no point to it. they are never going to kill the demon, they are never going to be happy, they are never really going to find peace. and thats the way the world works, and the faster you can grasp that the better off in life youll be.